Friday, November 9, 2007

Little Trouble This Week

Hi J-Land. hope all are doing good. I had some problems , this week. I developed pnuemonia and had a liter of fluid in my lung that had to be drawn off. I also had two units of plasma. I was in the hospital, three days. So glad to be home!! Had my third chemo treatment, yesterday, now I'll be on rest for three weeks and then have a cat scan to see if there's any improvement to the tumors, then start back on chemo. Weather here in Nashville, TN is beautiful and the trees are all aglow!! I love this time of year!! So , you all stay safe and God be with, each of you. I have a couple of things to share, I hope you enjoy. Till next time, Hugs to all, Barbara


                                                


Attitude

There once was a woman who woke up one morning,
Looked in the mirror,
And noticed she had only three hairs on her head.

Well," she said, "I think I'll braid my hair today?"
So she did
And
She
Had
A
Wonderful
Day.



The next day she woke up,
Looked in the mirror
And saw that she had only two hairs on her head.

"H-M-M," she said,
"I think I'll part my hair down the middle today?"
So she did
And
She
Had
A
Grand
Day.




The next day she woke up,
Looked in the mirror and noticed that she had only one hair on her head.

"Well," she said,
"today I'm going to wear my hair in a pony tail."
So she did
And
She
Had
A
Fun,
Fun
Day.




The next day she woke up,
Looked in the mirror and noticed that there wasn't a single hair on her head.

"YEA!" she exclaimed,
"I don't have to fix my hair today!"




Attitude is everything.

 
 

Be kinder than necessary,
For everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.

Live simply,


Love generously,

Care deeply,

Speak kindly.......

Leave the rest to God

Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...

 

It's about learning to dance in the rain

 

 

 


Is God Dancing On Your Potato Chips?


Not too long ago I had "one of those days." I was feeling pressure from a writing deadline. I had company arriving in a couple days and the toilet was clogged. I went to the bank, and the trainee teller processing my deposit had to start over three times. I swung by the supermarket to pick up a few things and the lines were serpentine.

 

By the time I got home, I was frazzled and sweaty and in a hurry to get something on the table for dinner. Deciding on Campbell's Cream of Mushroom soup, I grabbed a can opener, cranked open the can, then remembered I had forgotten to buy milk at the store. Nix the soup idea. Setting the can aside, I went to plan "B", which was leftover baked beans. I grabbed the Tupperware container from the fridge, popped the seal, took a look and groaned. My husband isn't a picky eater, but even HE won't eat baked beans that look like caterpillars.

 

Really frustrated now, I decided on a menu that promised to be as foolproof as it is nutrition-free: hot dogs and potato chips. Retrieving a brand new bag of chips from the cupboard, I grabbed the cellophane and gave a hearty pull. The bag didn't open. I tried again. Nothing happened. I took a breath, doubled my muscle, and gave the bag a hearty wrestle. With a loud pop, the cellophane suddenly gave way, ripping wide from top to bottom. Chips flew sky high. I was left holding the bag, and it was empty.

 

It was the final straw. I let out a blood curdling scream. "I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!" My husband heard my unorthodox cry for help. Within minutes he was standing at the doorway to the kitchen, where he surveyed the damage: an opened can of soup, melting groceries, moldy baked beans, and one quivering wife standing ankle deep in potato chips. My husband did the most helpful thing he could think of at the moment. He took a flying leap, landing flat-footed in the pile of chips. And then he began to stomp and dance and twirl, grinding those chips into my linoleum in the process!

 

I stared. I fumed. Pretty soon I was working to stifle a smile. Eventually I had to laugh. And finally I decided to join him. I, too, took a leap onto the chips. And then I danced. Now I'll be the first to admit that my husband's response wasn't the one I was looking for. But the truth is, it was exactly what I needed. I didn't need a cleanup crew as much as I needed an attitude adjustment, and the laughter from that rather funky moment provided just that.

 

So now I have a question for you, and it's simply this:  Has God ever stomped on your chips? I know that, in my life, there have been plenty of times when I've gotten myself into frustrating situations and I've cried out for help, all the while hoping God would show up with a celestial broom and clean up the mess.

 

What often happens instead is that God dances on my chips, answering my prayer in a completely different manner than I had expected, but in the manner that is best for me after all. Sometimes I can see right away that God's response was the best one after all. Sometimes I have to wait weeksor months before I begin to understand how and why God answered a particular prayer the way he did. There are even some situations that, years later, I'm still trying to understand. I figure God will fill me in sooner or later, either this side of Heaven or beyond.

 

Do I trust Him? Even when He's answering my prayers in a way that is completely different from my expectations? Even when He's dancing and stomping instead of sweeping and mopping? Can I embrace what He's offering? Can I let His joy adjust my attitude? Am I going to stand on the sidelines and sulk, or am I willing to learn the steps of the dance He's dancin' with my needs in mind? I'll be honest with you: Sometimes I sulk. Sometimes I dance. I'm working on doing more of the latter than the former. I guess the older I get the more I realize that He really does know what He's doing. He loves me and I can trust Him. Even when the chips are down.

 

Author Unknown

 

 

 


"All races and tribes in the world are like different colored flowers of one meadow.All are beautiful"


 


                                                          


                                                      

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

ONE DAY AT A TIME

Hi J'Land. I had my second treatment today and still no side effects. This seemed to make the doctors happy.  I do feel like, I'm feeling better, a little more energy. I'm going to make it, one day at a time. God bless all for the prayers, I feel them working. I have a few things to share with you, hope you enjoy them or know someone they can help. God bless and take care, till we talk again. Hugs,Barbara


                                                  


Ray Of Sunshine <<< click here

So beautiful!!!

 

 

 

THE FOUR BLESSED LOOKS




Look back and Thank God.
   Look forward and Trust God.
  Look around and Serve God.
Look within and Find God!"

"I asked God, 'How do I get the best out of life?'   God said, 'Face your past without regrets.  Handle your present with confidence.  Prepare for the future without fear!'"

"Without God, our week is: Mournday, Tearsday, Wasteday, Thirstday, Fightday, Shatterday and Sinday.  So, allow Him to be with you every day!"

"Life is short, so forgive quickly.  Believe slowly.  Love truly.  Laugh un controllably.  Never regret anything that makes you happy.  And have a wonderful journey!!


 


 


 


             The Holy Alphabet... 


             



              Although things are not perfect

              Because of trial or pain

              Continue in thanksgiving

              Do not begin to blame

              Even when the times are hard

              Fierce winds are bound to blow

              God is forever able

              Hold on to what you know

              Imagine life without His love

              Joy would cease to be

              Keep thanking Him for all the things

              Love imparts to thee

              Move out of 'Camp Complaining'

              No weapon that is known

              On earth can yield the power

              Praise can do alone

              Quit looking at the future

              Redeem the time at hand

              Start every day with worship

              To 'thank' is a command

              Until we see Him coming

              Victorious in the sky

              We'll run the race with gratitude

              Xalting God most high

              Yes, there'll be good times and yes some                  will be bad, but...

              Zion waits in glory...where none are ever sad!

 

 

 

 


 






              '  I AM Too blessed to be stressed!' The shortest distance 

between a problem and a solution is the distance between your knees and 

the floor.

              The one who kneels to the Lord can stand up to anything. 

Love and peace be   with you forever, Amen.

 

 


 

from my great friend, Sonata, who also suffers from her third bout of cancer.

Thursday, October 25, 2007

Hi J'Land!! Just a short note to let you know, I'm not having any side effects to my chemo . This makes me very happy, I'd  hate to deal with those too. Another session this coming Tues. Moving right along!! LOL. Hope you all have a safe weekend. God bless, Hugs,Barbara


Tuesday, October 23, 2007

ANOTHER START

Hi J'Land, how's everyone? Well, I started my new round of chemo, today. Wasn't so bad, just took so long and I'm very tired. I was told today, that I have another tumor, besides the one in my lung. This one is close to my esophagus and is about an inch big. A surprise for sure but I may as well have it now, than later. That way, maybe they can get them both with this set of treatments. LOL, can't give up hope!! The Lord has laid His hand on me and I'm ready to take each day as it comes. I realized some days will be worse than others but with God's help, I will make it!!!!! I just wanted to let you know about my first session, I'm tired and need some rest. So stay safe and may God bless. Hugs to all, Barb


 


                                             

Monday, October 22, 2007

TOMORROW

Hi J'Land. Well, tomorrow my battle starts again and I want to tell you, I'm ready!! I'll add to my journal, tomorrow night and tell you how it goes.  God bless and good night. Barb


 


                                                                   

Sunday, October 21, 2007

Ok, let's fight!!

Ok, J Land, I'm back tonight and I have quit, rattling my cage!! I lost my reason  for reasoning,last night but I think I have found it again. So, I'm ready for a good hard fight, with this cancer. It seemed like The Lord told me, Hey, Barb!! After, I've given you the strength to overcome, losing both parents and your only sibling plus getting you through the first battle, now, you are doubting Me? I feel so ashamed. How could I doubt? I'm so blessed with so many things, my children and grandchildren, a roof over my head, food, clothing and such great friends. I am able to get up, every morning, I can walk, smell, see and hear, how often I take these things for granted!! My Precious Lord, forgive me. Ok, now to fight my fight. Tomorrow I go for a PT, actually a blood test and I start back on chemo, Tues. Chemo,  once a week , every  3 weeks then off 3 weeks. I'll do my best to keep my journal, updated, as often as I can. Many thanks for all the positive love and prayers, that have been sent my way. You are all angels, to me. So, until our keyboards, touch, once again, may God bless and keep you safe, Hugs,Barbara

Saturday, October 20, 2007

Good evening J-Land. Hope all are doing well, today. I just sat here and look at a blank screen. I feel completely lost. My mind is swirling with all kinds of thoughts. I can't focus on any one thing. I do know God is with me but the same question keeps running through my mind---am I going to die? I can't leave my kids yet. Even though they're all grown, they need me so much and I know the pain, they'll feel, if I do die. I still feel the pain of my parents death. Am I scared?  You betcha I am. I think if I started screaming, I'd never stop. I want to run away but I have no where to go. I need something so bad and have no idea what it is. I 've been divorced , 7 years and I need my husbands' arms to hold me and tell me that everything is gonna be alright but that just can't be. I am crying. I am sure I sound like a raving maniac but indeed, I feel like one tonight. I'm so afraid, I'm losing it!! Forgive me for my honesty but I need to vent, tonight. Please God, give me strength!! My faith is strong but I am so weak. Good night, J'Land and God bless, Barbara

Friday, October 19, 2007

Hi all at J-Land. I'd like to take this time to thank my special friend, Deb and all her friends that have heard about my cancer being relapsed and have left such kind words. It's still hard for me to believe, that the cancer is back and bigger than it was to start with. Just 4 months ago, it was an inch, now three inches. I was so in hopes, that what they saw was a scar but that wasn't meant to be. Ok, the fight shall continue!! I will not give up. Besides, LOL, I'm already experienced in fighting!! I start my chemo, again, Oct. 23. This could be a lengthy session, I go 3 weeks, once a week, for chemo and then off 3 weeks. This could last, up to 9 months. Evey six weeks, they will do a new cat scan and see if I'm responding. I still know that God has a reason and has brought me this far and I'll continue to leave it in His hands. God be with each of you and keep you safe. Hugs,Barbara

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

THE VERDICT IS IN

MY DEAR J-LAND FRIENDS,
LETTING YOU KNOW, MY CANCER IS IN REMISSION . I  HAD TWO MASSES, ONE IS COMPLETELY GONE AND THE OTHER HAS GONE FROM THE SIZE OF A LEMON TO THE SIZE OF A  CHERRY TOMATO. IT IS EITHER SCAR TISSUE OR SOME OF THE MASS LEFT. THEY WILL DO ANOTHER C-SCAN IN ABOUT 3 OR 4 MONTHS. SO, I REALLY FEEL IT'S  JUST SCAR TISSUE, AFTER 34 TREATMENTS OF RADIATION. THANKS FOR ALL YOUR PRAYERS.  GOD IS GOOD!!!!!LOVE, BARBARA

Monday, July 9, 2007

GETTING CLOSE

Hi J-Land, friends!! Hope all are doing good. Well, this Wednesday, I'll find out the verdict. I had my last cat scan done yesterday. I'm asking each of you for a powerful prayer!! I've come, this far and it's so wonderful, that the end is in sight. I feel that all the prayers have been anwsered and that I'll come out of this, with a clean slate. I can never thank each of you enough, for the prayers. I'm still tired but my body feels good. For anyone that has cancer or know someone that does, please tell my story and tell them,   they can make it!! I'll let each of you know, Wednesday , how this has turned out, so till then, keep smiling and know that God is with you. God bless, Hugs,Barbara

Friday, June 29, 2007

I'm Feeling the Sunshine

 Hi my friends at J-Land. First off, I'm so sorry it's been so long since I last added an entry. Some of it has been laziness, the other has been family problems. But, enough of that. I finished my radiation three weeks ago and am still having a few side effects ,  nothing major. I go two weeks from this Wednesday , to find out if the treatments has rid ,my body, of the cancer . They will do a c-scan. I have great hopes that they will find it gone. The Lord has been with me, throughout this !!  The prayers have seen me through , many sleepless nights. I have followed my 5 F's- Faith in God!! Faith in prayer. Faith in my doctors. Faith in my friends . Faith in myself. -I am prepared to follow my Lord home, if this is His wish. I feel pretty good, though. I do believe the Lord has more work for me on earth, I don't think my work here, is done.  Next entry I write, will be the verdict :-) Till then, May God bless each of you and have a very safe 4th of July. Your friend in God,Barbara

Friday, April 20, 2007

MAKING MY WAY

  Well J-Land, I completed my second round of radiation today -so far, so good. I feel like I've climbed that mountain and am standing on the plateau, ready to start back down. Only two sessions of chemo left and then I'll only be getting radiation. Praise God, I feel good and know, I can make it. You all have no idea what your comments and prayers have done for me. I thank God, everyday, for each of you.


  I have another share, I'd like to share with you. Read it  and if you know of anyone that this would help, please , pass it on.


  Remember, I'm on that plateau and feel  all the  closer to my Lord. God bless each of you, with love and hugs,Barbara



                                             

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Another Lovely Share

People are always sending me, such beautiful stories. I hope you don't mind,me sharing some, with you. Love and hugs,Barbara


 


         


Subject: Thorns - in remembrance of Easter<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />


 


Thank Him for the Thorns...

Sandra felt as low as the heels of her Birkenstocks when she pulled open
the florist shop door,


against an April gust of wind. Her life had been as sweet as a spring breeze and then in the


fourth month of her second pregnancy, a "minor" automobile accident stole her joy. This was Easter
week and the time she should have delivered their infant son. She grieved
over their loss.


Troubles had multiplied. Her husband's company "threatened" to transfer his job to a new location.

Her sister had called to say that she could not come for her long awaited holiday visit.


What's worse, Sandra's friend suggested that Sandra's grief was a God-given path to maturity that


would allow her to empathize with others who suffer.

"She has no idea what I'm feeling," thought Sandra with a shudder. "

Easter, Thanksgiving, Holidays? Thankful for what?" she wondered. "For a
careless driver whose truck was hardly scratched when he rear-ended her?

For an airbag that saved her life, but took her child's?"

"Good afternoon, can I help you?" Sandra was startled by the approach of the shop clerk.

"I.... I need an arrangement," stammered Sandra.

"For Easter ? Do you want the beautiful but ordinary, or would you like to
challenge the day with a customer favorite I call the "Easter Special"?

I'
m convinced that flowers tell stories," she continued. "Are you looking
for
something that conveys gratitude this Easter?"

"Not exactly!" Sandra blurted out. "In the last five months, everything that could go wrong


has gone wrong." Sandra regretted her outburst, and was surprised when the clerk said,


"I have the perfect arrangement for you."

Then the bell on the door rang, and the clerk greeted the new customer, "Hi, Barbara...let me get your order."

She excused herself and walked back to a small workroom, then quickly
reappeared, carrying an arrangement of greenery,


bows, and what appeared to be long-stemmed thorny roses. Except the ends of the rose stems were


neatly snipped, there were no flowers.

"Do you want these in a box?" asked the clerk. Sandra watched for the
customer's response. Was this a joke? Who would want rose stems with no
flowers! She waited for laughter, but neither woman laughed.

"Yes, please," Barbara replied with an appreciative smile. "You'd think
after three years of getting the special, I wouldn't be so moved by its
significance, but I can feel it right here, all over again." She said, as
she gently tapped her chest.

Sandra stammered, "Ah, that lady just left with, uh.... she left with no flowers!"

"That's right, said the clerk. "I cut off the flowers. That's the "Special".


I call it the Easter Thorns Bouquet."

"Oh, come on! You can't tell me someone is willing to pay for that!"
exclaimed Sandra.

"Barbara came into the shop three years ago, feeling much as you do, today,"


explained the clerk. "She thought she had very little to be thankful for.

She had just lost her father to cancer; the family business was failing;
her son had gotten into drugs; and she was facing major surgery." "That
same year I had lost my husband," continued the clerk. "For the first time in
my life, I had to spend the holidays alone. I had no children, no husband, no
family nearby, and too much debt to allow any travel."

"So what did you do?" asked Sandra.

"I learned to be thankful for thorns," answered the clerk quietly.

"I've always thanked God for the good things in my life and I NEVER
questioned Him why those GOOD things happened to me, but when the bad stuff
hit, I cried out, "WHY? WHY Me?!" It took time for me to learn that the
dark times are important to our faith! I have always enjoyed the 'flowers'
of my life, but it took the thorns to show me the beauty ofGod's comfort!

You know, the Bible says that God comforts us when we're afflicted, and
from His consolation we learn to comfort others."

Sandra sucked in her breath, as she thought about what her friend had
tried
to tell her. "I guess the truth is, I don't want comfort. I've lost a baby and


I'm angry with God."

Just then someone else walked in the shop. "Hey, Phil!" the clerk greeted
the balding, rotund man.

"My wife sent me in to get our usual Easter arrangement...twelve
thorny,  


long-stemmed stems!" laughed Phil as the clerk handed him a tissue
wrapped arrangement from the refrigerator.

"Those are for your wife?" asked Sandra incredulously. "Do you mind
telling me why she wants a bouquet that looks like that?"

"No... I'm glad you asked," Phil replied. "Four years ago, my wife and I
nearly divorced. After forty years, we were in a real mess, but with the
Lord's grace and guidance, we trudged through problem after problem.


The Lord rescued our marriage.

Jenny, here (the clerk) told me she kept a vase of rose stems to remind her
of what she had learned from "thorny" times. That was good enough for me.

I took home some of those stems. My wife and I decided to label each
one
for a specific "problem" and give thanks for what that problem taught us."

As Phil paid the clerk, he said to Sandra, "I highly recommend the Special!"

"I don't know if I can be thankful for the thorns in my life." Sandra said
 to the clerk. "It's all too... fresh."

"Well," the clerk replied carefully, "my experience has shown me that the
thorns make the roses more precious. We treasure God's providential care
more during trouble than at any other time. Remember that it was a crown
of thorns that Jesus wore so we might know His love. Don't resent the thorns."

Tears rolled down Sandra's cheeks. For the first time since the accident,
she loosened her grip on her resentment. "I'll take those twelve
long-stemmed thorns, please," she managed to choke out.

"I hoped you would," said the clerk gently. "I'll have them ready in a minute."

"Thank you. What do I owe you?"

"Nothing. Nothing but a promise to allow God to heal your heart. The first


year's arrangement is always on me." The clerk smiled and handed a card to
Sandra. "I'll attach this card to your arrangement, but maybe you would
like to read it first."

It read: My God, I have never thanked You for my thorns. I have thanked

You a thousand times for my roses, but never once for my thorns. Teach
me
the  glory of the cross I bear; teach me the value of my thorns. Show me that
I have climbed closer to You along the path of pain. Show me that, through
my tears, the colors of Your rainbow look much more brilliant."

Praise Him for the roses; thank Him for the thorns.


 


 

Monday, April 9, 2007

Three more chemo treatments!!! Believe me, I'll be so happy to say good-bye to them. I have a rest week, this week, just have to go for blood test. I'll start my radiation in about two weeks, I hear they aren't as bad as the chemotherapy. Hope you all had a wonderful blessed Easter. I did.  I had dinner with all my children, that's always a time of happiness, for me. Till next time, My J-Land friends, love and hugs,Barbara


http://www.geocities.com/Heartland/Acres/7132/survivor.html


                                                           


                                                               

Friday, April 6, 2007

SHARING

I had this shared with me, I hope you enjoy it , as much as I did or know someone it would help. Happy Easter to all. God's love to all. Hugs,Barbara


 


I have cancer...
but cancer does not have me.
Cancer is not who I am.
It is only a bend
in the road
that is my life's journey...

an unexpected detour on my path.
It is a
lesson in the cosmic schoolroom that is 
human existence.

So I Will
pause to rest...and heal ...
and study the lesson...
before I move on to my life beyond cancer.



I will not
give in to fear, and I will not
be discouraged by setback.
Setbacks are only opportunities

to review the lesson.



I will not be ashamed
of my scars.
My scars are the brushstrokes

in the masterpiece that is my life



I will be thankful for
the many blessings cancer

has brought
into my life:
People I never would have known,
love that I had never been still
or quiet enough to witness,
humility I needed,
strength I thought I had lost,
courage I never knew I had.



I will remember
that I can still have fun

and that it's Okay -
~even healthy!~ to be silly.


I will remember
that
to find the joy in rainbows...
I must endure the rain.
And I will remember always that...
while I may have cancer...
cancer  does not  have me!
by
Kathy Cawthon
The Cancer Crusade
used with permission.

I recommend that you
click HERE
to view the "The Survivor Movie"
a very encouraging well made movie



Cancer is So Limited!
 
It cannot cripple LOVE!
It cannot shatter
HOPE!
It cannot corrode
FAITH!
It cannot destroy
CONFIDENCE!
It cannot kill
FRIENDSHIP!
It cannot shut out
MEMORIES!
It cannot silence
COURAGE!
It cannot invade the
SOUL!
It cannot destroy
PEACE!
It cannot quench the
SPIRIT!
It cannot lessen the
POWER OF THE RESURRECTION!!
 
IT CANNOT STEAL ETERNAL LIFE!!!
 
Our greatest enemy is not disease, but despair.  Keep trusting God's love so your Spirit will remain strong.  If cancer has invaded your life, refuse to let it touch your Spirit!  Your body can be severely afflicted and you might have great struggles, but if you keep trusting in God's love your Spirit will remain strong.
 
"fear not them which kill the body,
but are not able to kill the soul."
Matthew 10:28
 
Victim or Survivor
 
Although the definition said, "a cancer survivor is anyone who has ever been diagnosed with cancer and is alive today."  The first time I read it, I didn't feel like a cancer survivor.  Cancer victim seemed a much more accurate term.  But then the dust settled, treatment began, and I realized the "victim" thing just didn't fit.
 
I tossed the victim/survivor issue around and finally came to the conclusion that a victim and a survivor are the same thin - - almost.  The differences are subtle, but at the same time enormous.  The first thing I realized is that a survivor is a victim with an attitude.  After I understood that, things were a little better.  I had a choice about something - I could be a cancer victim or a cancer survivor.  I liked the idea of having an attitude and I liked the sound of being a survivor.
 
Next, I thought about a friend of mine who had metastasized breast cancer and was the epitome of a cancer survivor.  To Barbie, survivorship was a state of mind.  Despite the moments of sadness and pain, she never lost her ability to laugh about some of the absurdities of cancer and cancer treatment.  She treasured every moment and faced each new situation as best she could.  Eventually, the cancer got her body; however she  never allowed it to reach her Spirit.  I think of her as a survivor in the truest sense of the word.
 
Very slowly, the differences between being a survivor and victim became clear, and I started making a list.  I'm sure every survivor can add one or two more.  This is just a start..
 
Being a victim is a state of body.  Being a survivor is a state of mind.
 
A victim fears hair falling out.  A survivor knows bald is beautiful.
 
A victim  knows about feeling down.  A survivor knows feeling down is okay.
 
A victim dreads the side effects of treatments.  A survivor wonders how to conceal his membership in the Side-Effect-of-the-Month Club.
 
A victim is amazed at all the tears.  A survivor never leaves home without Kleenex.
 
A victim goes to "see" a doctor.  A survivor "consults with his or her physician.
 
A victim gets caught in despair.  A survivor prays a lot.
 
A victim feels helpless.  A survivor says "thanks" with dignity and grace.
 
A victim enjoys a good laugh.  A survivor loves one.
 
From the moment we are diagnosed, we are victims.  We must choose to be survivors.
Paula (Bachleda) Koskay
From Chicken Soup for the Surviving Soul
 
 

 
~  Father, make me sensitive to the pain in other people's hearts and help me do whatever I can to ease their pain.   ...Amen ~




 

Saturday, March 31, 2007

Hi all my J-Land companions. I see it's been a couple of weeks, since I wrote. So, let me catch you up, on things. Three weeks ago, they found a blood clot in my left leg. Have you ever had a blood clot? Well, I hadn't either but let me tell you, it's not some little mass of blood , lodge in a vein!! That sucker hurt like crazy!!It's taken me three weeks to be able to be up, more than a couple of hours. It would swell and run fever and since I was on blood thinners for it, all I could take is blood thinners, I've had to let my body deal with it on it's on. LOL, now I'll be on these thinners, about 6 months. Ain't that just great??? Also,since this developed, they've  put off my radiation , for another month. So, instead of the first of May, it'll be the last, when I'm done. I have 4 more chemo treatments to go. YES!!!! I'm getting there. Thanks God!! Actually, most of the time, I feel pretty good, just very tired. I hear the radiation, also , makes you tired. So, I guess, I'll be having a lazy summer. Thanks to all for the inspiring comments.  Deb, you are the greatest!!!! Love you, my friend. Until next time folks, may God walk with you and a smile always be your make up. Hugs to all, Barbara

Sunday, March 11, 2007

Well, my friends. It's been a rough week, the worst so far. I stay so tired but I make myself go!! I don't plan on laying down and playing dead. I'm now halfway through with my chemo and start radiation next Monday. Good news, even if it is vane!! I'm not going to lose my hair. I really dreaded that ,cause right now, I can put the cancer , in the back of my  mind and try to forget it but if I were to lose my hair, it would be a constant reminder. The Lord works in mysterious ways and I do believe that this was one. One thing I have noticed, lately is that I spend more time with nature. Watching birds,squirrels  and the blooming of all the new growth, around me. Seems it all has a more special meaning than before. Funny, how before I took so much of this for granted. God sends wake up calls to each of us, just in different ways. I have an off week, this week, meaning no treatments. Yippee!! Hopefully I can regain my strength by next week. Until we meet again, may God bless each of you, in whatever you or yours need. Keep smiling, hugs,Barbara

Saturday, March 3, 2007

I'm am so sorry J-Land members. It's been a long time, since I posted. No excuses, just tired, most of the time. Praise God, for I am already breathing better and after next week, I'll be half done with my chemo treatments!! My radiation is set up to start March 19th. Besides being so tired, my stomach has been giving me problems but even that has improved. I should be getting through with all my treatments, toward the last of May. Your prayers have been a constant source of comfort and I thank each of you for the strength they have given me to overcome this battle. As of today, I still haven't lost my hair. I'll try to do better , in keeping you informed. Till then, love and hugs to each.

Saturday, February 3, 2007

Just letting you know.

Well, folks, I had another treatment Wednesday. I have to say, this one hasn't been easy.I'm sick this time, stomach problems , bad. I'm taking all the medications for it, they told me too but nothing is helping. I guess, I'll have to call them. I lost 7 lbs, last week, in 7 days and know I have lost more since then. I hurt very bad. I know it could be worse and I keep telling myself that. LOL, no one said it would be easy. At the same time, I know My Lord will get me through this. I'll update you again, in a few days. Wishing each of you in J-Land, bright sunny days. Hugs,Barbara

Friday, January 26, 2007

Marching to Victory

Hi all in J-land. Treatments went  very good this last Wednesday No bad effects, at all. In fact, I feel pretty good. My next treatment is next Wednesday, I expect my hair to start coming out then, I had it cut short today, to lesson the shock, LOL. Haven't worn it this short since the 60's---remember the Pixies? I have 2 wigs and a few turbans, so I'm ready!! I'll be having my treatments in what they call "cycles" 3 treatments to a cycle, then, two weeks of rest. All told, 4 cycles with the last two, radiation. I feel each prayer sent my way and I appreciate each of them. Sometimes I feel enveloped in a golden light. You've all been a great inspiration. God bless, each of you. Hugs,Barbara

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Great News!!

Well, I started the chemo today but also, got some great news!! The cancer is in it's early stage and hasn't spread anywhere else!!!!!!! The prayers, with My Almighty's hand are already working. Praise God!!  This is the best news, I've had in a month. I will beat this !! I feel so strong with all of God's love and the love sent through each comment, from J'land!!  I'll be having four months of chemo and radiation along with the chemo, the last two months. Thanks  and God bless, each of you. Barb

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Ready for Chemo

Hi all, well I had a PET scan today, which is a lot like a MRI but more detailed. This will show, whether or not the cancer , has spread, anywhere else. I really feel that I'll get good results on it. I start my first chemo, tomorrow morning. I'm ready to start beating this NOW!! I feel so many angels , in the form of friends, in J-land and elsewhere, fighting this  with me. I can never say how much, I appreciate all the prayers and encouraging words. God is carrying me, every step of the way.I can't wait, till the time comes, that I can tell, all of you, I'm cured!! This will happen, I know. So hope all of you are doing good, tonight and may God be with all. More to come later, Hugs,Barb

Friday, January 12, 2007

The ballot is in

Well, most of my test are in. I do have lung cancer in my left lung. It is small cell, which is the fast spreading kind. I'll be starting chemo next week, after a full body scan Tuesday. I'm telling you straight....... I am scared!! It's a bigger thing than I could ever handle, so I gave it all to The Man , Upstairs. He knows what I need before I can even ask Him. So, may his will be done. I'm telling myself, I can beat this. I have to!! I'll let you know more, next week. Thanks for all the kind comments, they do mean, so much. God bless,Barbara

Friday, January 5, 2007

MORE OF MY WORK ON THE LINK BELOW

http://hometown.aol.com/babe73boo/index.html


 


I hope you enjoy these, I'll be adding more, soon. Hugs to all, Barbara

Next week is in sight!!

Well, I've made it this far , without losing my mind, LOL, (of course, some would disagree with that) Monday, I go for my cat scan and Tuesday, another biopsy and finally, I can get started on the road that The Lord has chosen for me. Which ever road that is, I really believe, I'm ready. It's not to say, I'm not scared, I am!! I'll be holding tight to Christs' hand and I know , wherever He leads me, I'll be fine. I'll let you all know my outcome, next week. Please keep me in your prayers and thanks to all of you that have been praying for me. I feel each prayer and each one, gives the the strength , to go on. Love and hugs, to all. Barbara