Tuesday, October 30, 2007


Hi J'Land. I had my second treatment today and still no side effects. This seemed to make the doctors happy.  I do feel like, I'm feeling better, a little more energy. I'm going to make it, one day at a time. God bless all for the prayers, I feel them working. I have a few things to share with you, hope you enjoy them or know someone they can help. God bless and take care, till we talk again. Hugs,Barbara


Ray Of Sunshine <<< click here

So beautiful!!!





Look back and Thank God.
   Look forward and Trust God.
  Look around and Serve God.
Look within and Find God!"

"I asked God, 'How do I get the best out of life?'   God said, 'Face your past without regrets.  Handle your present with confidence.  Prepare for the future without fear!'"

"Without God, our week is: Mournday, Tearsday, Wasteday, Thirstday, Fightday, Shatterday and Sinday.  So, allow Him to be with you every day!"

"Life is short, so forgive quickly.  Believe slowly.  Love truly.  Laugh un controllably.  Never regret anything that makes you happy.  And have a wonderful journey!!




             The Holy Alphabet... 


              Although things are not perfect

              Because of trial or pain

              Continue in thanksgiving

              Do not begin to blame

              Even when the times are hard

              Fierce winds are bound to blow

              God is forever able

              Hold on to what you know

              Imagine life without His love

              Joy would cease to be

              Keep thanking Him for all the things

              Love imparts to thee

              Move out of 'Camp Complaining'

              No weapon that is known

              On earth can yield the power

              Praise can do alone

              Quit looking at the future

              Redeem the time at hand

              Start every day with worship

              To 'thank' is a command

              Until we see Him coming

              Victorious in the sky

              We'll run the race with gratitude

              Xalting God most high

              Yes, there'll be good times and yes some                  will be bad, but...

              Zion waits in glory...where none are ever sad!






              '  I AM Too blessed to be stressed!' The shortest distance 

between a problem and a solution is the distance between your knees and 

the floor.

              The one who kneels to the Lord can stand up to anything. 

Love and peace be   with you forever, Amen.




from my great friend, Sonata, who also suffers from her third bout of cancer.

Thursday, October 25, 2007

Hi J'Land!! Just a short note to let you know, I'm not having any side effects to my chemo . This makes me very happy, I'd  hate to deal with those too. Another session this coming Tues. Moving right along!! LOL. Hope you all have a safe weekend. God bless, Hugs,Barbara

Tuesday, October 23, 2007


Hi J'Land, how's everyone? Well, I started my new round of chemo, today. Wasn't so bad, just took so long and I'm very tired. I was told today, that I have another tumor, besides the one in my lung. This one is close to my esophagus and is about an inch big. A surprise for sure but I may as well have it now, than later. That way, maybe they can get them both with this set of treatments. LOL, can't give up hope!! The Lord has laid His hand on me and I'm ready to take each day as it comes. I realized some days will be worse than others but with God's help, I will make it!!!!! I just wanted to let you know about my first session, I'm tired and need some rest. So stay safe and may God bless. Hugs to all, Barb



Monday, October 22, 2007


Hi J'Land. Well, tomorrow my battle starts again and I want to tell you, I'm ready!! I'll add to my journal, tomorrow night and tell you how it goes.  God bless and good night. Barb



Sunday, October 21, 2007

Ok, let's fight!!

Ok, J Land, I'm back tonight and I have quit, rattling my cage!! I lost my reason  for reasoning,last night but I think I have found it again. So, I'm ready for a good hard fight, with this cancer. It seemed like The Lord told me, Hey, Barb!! After, I've given you the strength to overcome, losing both parents and your only sibling plus getting you through the first battle, now, you are doubting Me? I feel so ashamed. How could I doubt? I'm so blessed with so many things, my children and grandchildren, a roof over my head, food, clothing and such great friends. I am able to get up, every morning, I can walk, smell, see and hear, how often I take these things for granted!! My Precious Lord, forgive me. Ok, now to fight my fight. Tomorrow I go for a PT, actually a blood test and I start back on chemo, Tues. Chemo,  once a week , every  3 weeks then off 3 weeks. I'll do my best to keep my journal, updated, as often as I can. Many thanks for all the positive love and prayers, that have been sent my way. You are all angels, to me. So, until our keyboards, touch, once again, may God bless and keep you safe, Hugs,Barbara

Saturday, October 20, 2007

Good evening J-Land. Hope all are doing well, today. I just sat here and look at a blank screen. I feel completely lost. My mind is swirling with all kinds of thoughts. I can't focus on any one thing. I do know God is with me but the same question keeps running through my mind---am I going to die? I can't leave my kids yet. Even though they're all grown, they need me so much and I know the pain, they'll feel, if I do die. I still feel the pain of my parents death. Am I scared?  You betcha I am. I think if I started screaming, I'd never stop. I want to run away but I have no where to go. I need something so bad and have no idea what it is. I 've been divorced , 7 years and I need my husbands' arms to hold me and tell me that everything is gonna be alright but that just can't be. I am crying. I am sure I sound like a raving maniac but indeed, I feel like one tonight. I'm so afraid, I'm losing it!! Forgive me for my honesty but I need to vent, tonight. Please God, give me strength!! My faith is strong but I am so weak. Good night, J'Land and God bless, Barbara

Friday, October 19, 2007

Hi all at J-Land. I'd like to take this time to thank my special friend, Deb and all her friends that have heard about my cancer being relapsed and have left such kind words. It's still hard for me to believe, that the cancer is back and bigger than it was to start with. Just 4 months ago, it was an inch, now three inches. I was so in hopes, that what they saw was a scar but that wasn't meant to be. Ok, the fight shall continue!! I will not give up. Besides, LOL, I'm already experienced in fighting!! I start my chemo, again, Oct. 23. This could be a lengthy session, I go 3 weeks, once a week, for chemo and then off 3 weeks. This could last, up to 9 months. Evey six weeks, they will do a new cat scan and see if I'm responding. I still know that God has a reason and has brought me this far and I'll continue to leave it in His hands. God be with each of you and keep you safe. Hugs,Barbara